Whenever I read God’s word of exposing man “Your lips are kinder than doves, but your heart is more sinister than the ancient serpent,” I thought it was directed at those in various sects and denominations who refused to accept God’s new work or those evil ones who had been purged and expelled from God’s family. I felt that although I was not perfectly kindhearted, I at least was not a malicious person.

Some time ago, persecution came upon a church. The brothers and sisters were so frightened that none of them dared perform their duties or attend meetings. The small-district leader and her assistant asked them to come out to have meeting a few times but couldn’t call them out. Although some came out reluctantly, they were full of fear because of the persecution and despite our fellowship with them they still had no faith in God. After knowing the situation, I not only didn’t try to solve the problem, but on the contrary I maliciously thought in my heart: Humph! These people are actually cowards and unbelievers and now they have been revealed in the persecution. Simply purge them away; what is the use of having them in God’s family? But when I told such a thought to my leader, she said, “Do you know the true situation? How did you fellowship with them when the persecution arose? Are you sure that none of them is able to stand firm? Do you really know the principles of purging people? You treat these souls so lightly and want to push them out of God’s family casually. Have you ever thought of God’s intention?” At her words, I was very unconvinced: How do you know I didn’t make efforts to fellowship? It’s very obvious that these people do not pursue the truth and they are the devils that have been revealed. But now, you blame me that I haven’t fellowshipped properly. I’ve really done a tough but thankless job. Humph! If only God would punish them right away! I was full of grievances, and even hatred.

Once, when I read the principles of purging and expelling people in The Manual of the Principles for the Church Work, I was dumbfounded, for I found that none of the principles said those who did not attend meetings when persecution came upon their church should be expelled. Instead, I saw that God is saving man to the utmost and he will not give anyone up even if there is a gleam of hope. God truly loves man so much; he is so concerned about every soul, always loves man to the utmost and tolerates man to the limit, always shows compassion and mercy to man, consoles and supports man, and is full of kindness for man. At that moment, I thought of these words of God: “Each part of the work that God does is considerably difficult. Each step of the work that God does on earth is embarrassing to God. How hard his work on earth is! How difficult the footsteps of God’s working on earth are! For man’s weaknesses, for man’s deficiencies, for man’s immaturity, for man’s ignorance, and for man’s everything, God has been making well-conceived plans and has been considering all of them thoughtfully. … Although God’s words are sincere and earnest and involve no bad intentions, who is willing to accept them? Who is willing to completely be obedient to God? This has badly broken God’s heart. He is taking care of people day and night, feeling concern for their life and bearing and sympathizing with their weaknesses as well. In doing every step of the work or speaking every word, he experiences so many setbacks, being constantly in a dilemma and considering day and night: man’s weaknesses, man’s disobedience, man’s immaturity, and man’s fragility….” Inspired by the words of God, I felt unbearably ashamed. In the light of God’s word, I saw my malicious innate nature. I was moved by God’s love. I shed tears of self-reproach. God loves man so much! God knows man’s weaknesses, knows how difficult it is to deal with man, and even more knows how deeply man has been corrupted by satan. In dealing with man’s corruptions, God has done his work to save man step by step; he has never complained about the difficulties nor given up saving man…. In retrospect, many times I was also weak and passive, and sometimes, I even wanted to depart from God, but God always drew me with his hand of love and guided me with his word, so that I have been kept and followed up to today. God has not put me to death because of my disobedience, but let me repent and make a fresh start. Why did I have no mercy on others? When the persecution came upon that church, I didn’t sincerely fellowship with the brothers and sisters about how to uphold testimony and fulfill our duties to satisfy God under such circumstances, but rather, I drew a casual conclusion about them and wanted to sentence them to death, and I even wished that God would punish them soon so that I wouldn’t have to worry about them anymore. How malicious my heart was! Wasn’t I exactly like the sinister ancient serpent? Through this matter, my malicious innate nature has been completely exposed, and I have realized that what God’s words have exposed is my substance. I am completely convinced of God’s words.

Haiyang

Ruzhou City, Henan Province