When I just quit my worldly job and got ready to make an all-out effort to perform my duty in God’s family, I was isolated because persecution involving me arose. During that period of time, I simply passed the days as if they were years. Every day I started my vagrant life from minutes past six o’clock in the morning and could not go home until seven o’clock in the evening (because at that time, in order to perform my duty, I deliberately hid the truth from my family and told them that I was still working). One day, a sister paged me; after giving her a call, I hurried to her home excitedly. On seeing her and several others, I asked gladly, “Is it that I can perform my duty now?” “No, we merely need to ask you for some information about a clue for evangelizing,” she answered. All at once, my heart sank. I had wanted to fellowship with them for a little more time, but the sister said, “We are going to have a meeting today; you may as well leave.” At that time, I forcedly held back my tears and left with heavy steps. Lonely and aimless, I wandered up and down the street in the whirling snow. Looking at the crowds of people, I gave a sigh: “Ah! Where is the place I call home?” I could no longer restrain my tears of grievance. “Everyone else has his duty to perform and can gather together with other brothers and sisters and fellowship about and enjoy the word of God. Only I am left unattended, not daring to go home or go to the church, and all the brothers and sisters ‘keep their distance’ from me.” In an instant, desolation, loneliness, aimlessness, and helplessness swept through me. “How should I walk the path ahead? Could it be that I will loaf about the street to kill time every day?”

At that moment, these words of God occurred to me: “In the future, it will be that each of you will, under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, walk the path that you should walk. When undergoing the tribulation, who will be able to take care of anyone else? Everyone has his own sufferings; each person has his own stature; no one’s stature is the same as that of anyone else. Husbands will be unable to take care of their wives; parents will be unable to take care of their children. Nobody will be able to take care of anyone else. Different from now when people are able to take care of and support each other, that will be the time for each kind of person to be revealed. … People have to hold on to what they have gained to walk through the final stretch of path. Now, you all cannot see clearly and are all shortsighted. It is not an easy matter to successfully experience this step of the work.” Ah, yes! When undergoing the tribulation, who is able to take care of anyone else? Why do I always want others’ care? I have God; I am not walking this path alone. I won’t be lonely since I have God walking with me. Just as God’s words say, I should hold on to what I have gained to walk through the final stretch of path. Then I recalled that in the past, it was continually fellowshipped that God’s present intention is to save man and is the spreading of the gospel work. Although I can’t come into contact with the brothers and sisters to preach the gospel together with them, I can look for clues for evangelizing by myself or preach the gospel to the people of my original denomination. At the moment, I no longer felt lonely and no longer felt that I was a loafer having nothing to do; on the contrary, I felt that there were so many things waiting for me to do.

In the days following that, I preached the gospel in the daytime, and after getting home in the evening, I made use of the short time to equip myself with God’s word and recite the hymns. Moreover, I brought three people to God by relying on God. During the two weeks of my being isolated, I felt that my relationship with God not only did not become estranged, but on the contrary, it became closer. When living independently, I even more felt that I could not be away from God even for a single moment. O God! I thank you from my heart. It is you who have enabled me to see your deeds in my actual experiences. I have really experienced that having the guidance of the Holy Spirit and having your word as my beacon, I will not be lonely. I am even more grateful to you for giving me a chance to practice living an independent life. At this moment, I can’t help singing the hymn: “O God! I give my heart to you, and wait for your guidance at every time. Although the path is rough and uneven, I am willing to follow you forward. I remember that I once sworn to you that I would repay your love to the last drop. Under your guidance, I am contented and tread in your footstep forward; under your guidance, I am contented, and I am willing to come along with you regardless of wind or rain.”

Xiaofan

Cangzhou City, Hebei Province