I believed in God just for gaining blessings, escaping the punishment, and avoiding disasters. Therefore, I always paid attention to some strange and unusual things. When I heard that such-and-such a strange thing happened somewhere, that an earthquake struck such-and-such a place and thus such-and-such a number of people died, or that so-and-so received God’s punishment after departing from God, I would become active at once. If no one talked about such things for a long time, I became sluggish again and lost the enthusiasm to pursue.

During SARS, it was spread that earthquakes would happen as well, so everyone was in a state of alarm. Seeing this situation, I thought that the day of God had arrived and that God had begun to punish the great red dragon and all the evildoers. Thus, my enthusiasm was activated again, and I thought, “I shall perform my duty every day and stay together with the brothers and sisters; in this way, no matter how great the disasters are, they won’t befall me.” Therefore, I was especially active in performing my duty, being busy going to the small groups to resolve the problems as well as putting great efforts into the gospel work. When seeing the unbelievers, I thought, “The time when God avenges the wrong for us has arrived. Don’t you laugh at me? Today, see how our God will punish you!”

Gradually, SARS passed, and earthquakes were no longer talked about. As a result, I became slack and unburdened, being unwilling to go to the small groups and having no goals in performing my duty. Little by little, I even began to doubt about God: Isn’t the sky still the original sky and the earth the original earth? Just when I was in such a state of being nearly paralyzed and falling, God again uttered his voice of salvation “Think About Your Actions and Behavior.” God says: “Whenever my hand starts to do something, these people are ready to take actions and want to take the lead. They only want to run ahead of all the others for fear of not being seen by me, doing the things they think are right and speaking the things they think are right. But they never know that everything they do never has anything to do with the truth, and that all their doings are destroying and disturbing my plan. Although they have been exerting all their strength and have very genuine will and intent to endure hardships, nothing they do has to do with me, because I have never seen that their doings are well-meant, much less that they have laid anything upon my altar. This is what they have done before me over so many years.” Only after reading the latest utterance of Almighty God did I somewhat wake up: Actually, I stay in God’s family just for the purpose of avoiding the great disasters, and I believe in God in the hope that the disasters would come as soon as possible so that I could enjoy the blessings of the kingdom of heaven early. When hearing that disasters would befall, I ran around working more actively than anyone else. When seeing no disasters arrive, I began to doubt. Am I not exactly such a kind of person as revealed by God’s words? As my belief is established on this basis, doesn’t everything I have done have nothing to do with the truth? Didn’t I do anything according to my imaginations? Isn’t it that I have been bartering with God and making demands of him under the sway of my intent of gaining blessings? God’s words thoroughly pointed out my substance, hit my fatal corruption, and woke up my heart and spirit. I clearly saw my incorrect viewpoint of pursuit and understood that if I, while believing in God, want to receive God’s commendation, I have to first have a right viewpoint of pursuit and have a correct goal to pursue. No matter what God does, I should have a heart of fearing him and be submissive before him instead of having this or that kind of desire. No matter whether I am to receive blessings or suffer punishment, I should perform my duty properly and complete God’s commission faithfully. I am grateful to Almighty God for his salvation. If it were not for the timely supply of God’s words, I would still hold to my erroneous viewpoint and think that I was quite loyal to God. Through the guidance of God’s words, I have realized that over all these years, I have not laid anything upon God’s altar indeed. I am willing to correct my viewpoint of pursuit and walk every step in a down-to-earth manner.

Zhang Lei

Puyang City, Henan Province